Sabin of the Green Mountains
A story about rusted brakes, midnight Denny’s runs, and the poetry of old cars and the life we live with them. I wasn’t sure whether to share this, but I’m fond of the roads we’ve traveled. From Earl to Shazam… and beyond.
One of the challenges of living with the kind of mental state I work with is remembering a complete flow of life. Waking up tomorrow holding on to what I’ve accomplished or learned from today is a conscious effort for me, just shy of tattooing (which I’ve seriously considered doing, Memento). I think it has something to do with the hypnosis as a child, or maybe just side effects from the PTSD, but either way, I’ve decided to devote some time on Sundays to check in with what I did and tried to do the previous week.
Hey everyone. Thanks for checking in! It’s been a wild couple of weeks here. My mental state is up and down, but I expect it now and it’s easier to manage, though still as exhausting. I’ve written a couple of new pieces, mostly just some improvs and idea sketches, but I do have a piano […]
Living with mental illness feels like standing at the edge of a black hole, caught between worlds. The pull of chaos and confusion is relentless, making it hard to reach out, to be heard, or to understand. But there’s a secret in the storm: observation. In those rare moments of calm, we find the strength to communicate, to connect, and to hold on.
It was just about a year ago when I wrote a reflection on 2023, so I figured I’d do it again this year. It’s hard to put into words how it feels to look back on this past year. At this time last year, I was sitting in my living room, recording It Can Be […]
For most of my life, I stressed about proving myself and achieving perfection, but everything changed four years ago when I discovered the beauty of dilettantism—engaging in things out of love and curiosity rather than obligation. Experiences like Ayahuasca and mindfulness taught me to embrace imperfection and just be present. Now, I create without the pressure to excel and believe exploration is more valuable than mastery. It’s about joy and freedom, not achievement.
We become as surfers on a cosmic wave of potentiality, and all we can do is ride it out The path of recovery is paved with relapses and peppered with pitfalls, I’m finding. The tiger traps of my mind. I encounter them after certain triggers or epiphanies and it takes me hours, sometimes days, to […]
I went through old journal entries for inspiration tonight. I reminded myself of who I had been, pitfalls and traps I had fallen into, mirrors I wasn’t paying attention to. It’s painful to go back there, review that man’s thoughts as though they’re still mine. I think history is a useful tool in the long […]
Dearest Asha, You know I love you. I tell you all the time. Too much, probably. You’re so easy to love. Charming and kind. Courageous. Brilliant wit and soulful heart. A beautiful voice. Dazzling smile with galaxy eyes. For all the reasons that anyone else who meets you will love you, I love you. Their […]
